Sunday, August 16, 2015

Not all is lost

That moment--- or hours --when you thought everything online has disappeared and can't be found or signed into again. The panic when you feel locked out by google and then completely thwarted by technology. And then the sweet relief and total joy of figuring it out and realizing that the cloud did not swallow everything whole -and that it will all be ok. Silly ramblings but a huge sigh of relief.

Monday, December 20, 2010

would you believe it?

I miss blogging.

I miss reading them, I miss writing on mine.

Maybe a new year's resolution is cooking up.

We'll see....

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Just spent an hour catching up on all the blogs I haven't read in the past few months. I think the last time I must have read everyone was in September.

Sheesh! I am BEHIND!

Anyway, it reminded me how much more you get to know when you read the whole story instead of just a facebook status update.

Now don't get me wrong....I love my facebook. But I can tell that I've been missing out on the letter writing aspect of my friends' blogs.

So...if I haven't commented in a while, I'm sorry. I'll try and do better.

I have some extra work coming in that will force me to have a more organized schedule and now that NaNoWriMo is almost over (One more day 7K words to go!!) and the Army Ten Miler Training is over, maybe I can re-figure my free time pursuits.

Must find balance :-)

Anyway....happy first day of Advent to you.

Time to find peace and balance in all parts of our lives.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009


This is a long, sad post on the death of our cat. Sorry to be a downer....but I needed to process everything.

It's only a cat, I know that, but she still made me cry, and I am not even a cat person. It is not like we had owned her for ten or eleven years. It is not like she was pampered and adored. But she was our cat. She was a member of our family and having to be the one to give the ok to the doctor just plain sucked. No two ways about it.

It was time. I know that. I knew on Sunday night when I went upstairs to check on her and she gave me a clear look. The look said that she was done. That she was ready. It was as clear as if she had spoken the words out loud. I do not claim to understand; I certainly was not thinking of putting her down, so it is not like I was projecting my own thoughts. But it was there. Clearly.

And so I called the mobile vet on Monday. Asked about getting an appointment to look at our options since Cammie hates going to the vet office. Wanted to see what we could do to keep her comfortable. Kitty hospice if you will. And so an appointment was made for Wednesday.

Only by this morning, Tuesday, I could tell we would not make it to Wednesday. I called the vet again. Looks way worse. Tumor was still the same, but she was suddenly incontinent and having a hard time walking. Her breathing was shallow and labored. She groaned at me instead of meowing. It was such a sad sound. I realize she had not eaten in the last day and probably had not had much water either. I sat with her and made sure she at least got a little water in her, but she was still working so hard to breathe. My heart ached.

Vet agreed to come today to see what could be done for her. Pain meds administered, an IV bag hung and started, Cammie perks up a little, but still can not catch her breath. I have to admit, the little kitty iv was cute, even if it was sad. We agree she is not going to get better. It is time to hold her and love on her and help her to let go.

I snuggle in with her and tell her what a good cat she has been. The vet and I laugh about teaching her to use the litter box in the car on our road trip to North Carolina, I remind her that she can run after all the mice she wants in her next life, where she won’t hurt anymore. And I cry. A lot. My nose is stuffy, my head aches and I cry for an animal that I liked to pretend I did not much care for.

But we did care for her. All of us. She was faithful and loving and she never asked for much except a warm spot on the bed to sleep on, a basket to scratch and an occasional patch of sunlight to nap in.

Sometimes it really hurts to be the grown up. To be the one to make big decisions; to have to tell your kids about the realities of life and love. I swore after my last pet that I would not get another because it hurts too much to love so much. And I still feel the same way. I imagine I will say the same thing after our next pet too.

Goodnight Cammie Clementine. You saw us through the busy years of three boys four and under. Not many cats would have signed up for that gig. I hope you know how much you were loved.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

guess i'm rotten

Living in the land of, "Last one in is a rotten egg."

Last one up the stairs....

Last one in the car....

Last one in the shower.....

Last one. Last one. Last one.

My last one so loves this "game", but I have to admit it is driving me kind of crazy!

Monday, October 05, 2009

thoughts on a ten mile run

Yesterday, six friends and I ran the Army Ten Miler in Washington, D.C. read that right. I ran TEN MILES.

Can you believe it? Neither can I.

This year my new year's resolution was to learn to run so that I could do a 5k. By March I was able to run 3 miles without stopping. It was quite an accomplishment as I have NEVER run before. Ever. Anywhere. Even in high school, where we were all supposed to run the mile...I walked it.

So you can imagine my disappointment when the race I had wanted to enter filled up before I registered. But a bit of my bravado kicked in when I read about the annual army race.

I thought...."well, we've gotten up to 3 miles...whats 6 or 7 more? We have 7 months." And so I convinced my fellow training friends that we could learn to run that far. Mind you, learning to run 10 miles is an entirely different concept in mid-August than it was in April.

I saw a shirt at the race that said, "this seemed like a good idea three months ago."


But we persevered. We ran every Saturday (even on vacation!), we ran a lot during the week and somehow we made it to Sunday's race.

And I KICKED BUTT! (humility has never been one of my strong suits)

Not because I won---HA! I run 12 minute miles. The fellow that won finished before I was even at the halfway point.

But I kicked butt because I did it. I ran the whole way. Didn't stop. I had a great time---my wonderful husband brought the boys out to cheer me on and they even met me at the end with flowers. I was giddy with my friends, I was surprisingly fast at the end and today I am tired. But I am ready to look at the spring races and I am ready to see what might be next on my "to do" list.

A few memories from the day....

the joy of finding a real bathroom at the hotel before the race
the insane lines of people waiting for port a potties.
Cheering people on at the port a potties...while Karina yelled, "SUCK it olson"
The little old lady running in front of me (she HAD to be pushing 80)
The grandpas I passed who asked if I had vodka in my camel back
The absolute joy I felt when I saw my boys and my hubby cheering for me....I don't know who was more or them!
The bravery of the wounded warriors who were giving it their all during the race
The odd coincidence that the Rocky theme came on my MP3 player right as the band began playing it at mile 8
The thrill of seeing the finish line and knowing I still had enough left in me to sprint.

Wow. I know this is long and I know it's a bit braggy...but was fun!

Thanks for reading this far.

Cherry Blossom 10 miler anyone???

Sunday, September 06, 2009

Three months ago

Three months ago, school was still in session and we were patiently awaiting the arrival of summer.

Three months ago, we were dreaming and scheming of the fun we would have at the pool, in the backyard, on the road.

Three months ago we had yet to tour the US Capitol, visit Luray Caverns, or pick peaches and blackberries.

Three months ago I still blogged (at least occasionally) instead of spending all my free time on Facebook.

Three months ago I had never run 8 miles. Or even *thought* about running 8 miles.

But it's a new school year and as many of you know, I like beginnings. So a new look to the blog and another try again at blogging.

Seems like I spend an awful lot of time starting over, instead of just plugging along. But my writing is seasonal and summer isn't for writing.

It's for berry picking, car trips, beach vacations and enjoying every minute possible with the handsome guys in my world.

Three months have gone by too fast again.